courage.

I have decided to adopt 4 words to focus on throughout this year. I have heard and read about other people choosing a word for the year, and being the indecisive person that I am, I couldn’t just decide on one.

Breaking up the year into 3 month quarters, I decided on courage, focus, flourish, and joy. With courage being the first to bat.

courage (1)

courage – noun; the ability to do something that frightens one; strength in the face of pain or grief.

I chose courage first for several reasons. One, I joined the Hogwarts Running Club and was sorted into Gryffindor. If you are familiar with the magical series that defined my childhood, you will know that Gryffindor House is defined by its courage and loyalty. That seemed fitting. Two, I have been straddling the line of fear and courage for most of my life. I have bursts where I am so courageous and so daring, but then I immediately recoil in embarrassment, insecurity, and/or doubt. I want to stop doing that. Three, I want to be unapologetic in who I am, and I need courage to truly find out who that person is. I kind of know her, but she’s been a bit of a wallflower for a while.

The trouble with this Word of the Year project is that I am not one for follow through. I am easily distracted (by things shiny and dull), and my usual course of action on anything is as follows:

  1. Have an idea/Decide to adopt an idea
  2. Become extremely excited and motivated by idea
  3. Attempt something that has to do with idea
  4. Succeed/Fail (usually I deem it a failure if things don’t go exactly as I imagine)
  5. Lose focus and abandon idea

This is why it is January 8 and I’m just getting around to writing about it. I’ve been mulling around this idea in my head, and I’m really excited about it (refer to step  1 & 2). I think it will ultimately help me live intentionally (hello, buzz word) and force me to really come to terms with who I am and what my aspirations are. However, I am exhausted just thinking about it!

As a millennial, I think society expects me to be flaky and easily swayed. I tend to live up to that expectation when things aren’t easy. I compare myself to Instagram photos, and I easily succumb to the temptation of Netflix and my couch. I whine about not getting my way instead of brainstorming ways to be better. I tend to turn to Target to find joy, and I become extremely moody when I have spent too much time alone. It is my hope that these four words will set the tone for my days, weeks, and months of 2016. Everyday won’t be courageous, focused, flourishing, or joyful, but I hope that I will at least think to reset my mindset by remembering my words of the year.

Rise up, take courage, and do it. -Ezra 10:4